sojourning northward sometime this year, if he knows what’s good for him. Zach has produced content for Shmoop, Cliff Notes’ sexy, liberal arts-college-educated cousin, and is such a good writer it totally doesn’t make me want to chew my own hands off. Welcome, Zach!]

Back in 2002, I celebrated my birthday at Safeco Field on Edgar Martinez replica bat night.

It now seems ill advised to let a bunch of 5th graders hyped up on Mountain Dew Code Red wave around 32 ounces of compact lumber in a public space, but as far as I remember, nobody was injured.

Fortunately, the Mariners have released their promotional schedule for 2017, and my 10 year old self would be thrilled to know that the Gar swag is back. Edgar’s number will be retired on Saturday, August 12th, but the festivities will last the whole weekend. Promotions include Edgar bobbleheads (Friday),Chris Owings Jerseys replica numbers in honor of his number retirement ceremony (Saturday), replica jerseys (Sunday), and beating the tar out of the Angels (Friday, Saturday, Sunday).All these great Gar giveaways got us at Lookout Landing feeling nostalgic. So we thought it seemed like an opportune time to dig up a few of our favorite classic Mariners promotions – some that hit, some that missed, and some that bobbled.You can’t go wrong with a great bobblehead.Archie Bradley Jerseys It’s hard to put into words. There’s just something in the way their head, you know, bobbles.

The Mariners have produced some excellent bobblers over the years, from Ichiro, to Junior, to Randy Johnson and Dan Wilson, to King Felix, to Fernando Rodney.Zack Greinke JerseyThis surely goes down as one of the most bizarrely awesome moments in Mariners history. On August 26th, 2000, the legendary R&B singer talker with a voice smoother than Jay Buhner’s head announced the starting lineup over the PA, while fans got to take home one of his albums. If only Tuffy Gosewisch was on the roster then.

While the Mariners Train Car night has had a long and storied history beginning with the “Mariners Express” in 2000 and making prominent stops along the way for the 2002 “Gar Car” and 2005 “Moose Caboose,” the train was all but completely derailed in 2012 with the “Smoakamotive.”Of course then 2015 brought us “The Ack Attack Express” which, considering the fact that Dustin Ackley was to be traded the following month,Randy Johnson Jerseys makes it arguably worse.

All of this information leads us to believe that the Mariners Train Car series is cursed. (However the fact that the Mariners promotional staff missed their window on the “LoMocamotive” is criminal.)